stairway to heaven!!!

the past one month has been a roller coaster ride for me... farewells... partying like crazy and a lot of other stuff... it has now finally begun to sink in that what seemed improbable perhaps just a month back is true... i am gonna have to leave and that my friends is not a happy feeling...

neways this is not about my writing a psenti article... that time will come but it is not this day... today i wanted to write about that special thing that we here at bits pilani refer to as the psenti music nite... Joy this one is for you...

hmmm... now... lemme see... how to begin... this perhaps was one of the very few psenti nites that chose a very good mix of songs... from rock (both English and otherwise) to dance numbers... from psentimental stuff to absolutely leg shaking music... that too arranged in a very nice order... while hallowed be thy name and turn the page made the day for me dhoom machale had many more dance to its tunes... another thing was that ETV Rajasthan was recording this music nite as new year special and will run it on 2nd Jan... we are def going places... as it always happens though... the best was saved for the last... kandisa and the oh so psenti mustafa and how can i forget with or without you... though the rendition wasnt very great who gives a damn... i am pretty damn sure everyone had a lump in the throat when it was being played... a combination of the knowledge that this was gonna be the last song of their last music nite as well as the sheer brilliance of the song... all in all the whole affair was a very psenti one...

psenti why??? i have no idea... it is supposed to be the chance to party one last time on those hallowed floors of the audi... then why psenti???
perhaps its the knowledge that this maybe the one last time you can freak out without caring about other stuff of life... one last time when you can shake a leg with your bud knowing well enough that you may not have the guts to do that outside... its quite a scene... everyone, no matter if they know how to dance or not, trying out dances right from the DD to the jive and the bhangra... it also is the one last time you can just hold hands and listen to nothing else matters or mustafa or pal or purani jeans... that feeling of knowing that this may not be possible for a long to come...

we walkedaway from that emptying audi the one last time fully aware that our lives are never gonna be the same again... memories are all we carry and that hope that we shall meet once again... but that was the time that it first sank in that i have to go away... man i hate psenti stuff...

The time of my life....

I have undertaken what perhaps will be till date the toughest thing to write... a review for my psenti Oasis... i might get psenti quite often... please forgive me for that...

lets start with some pre oasis fun... the website, lifted from Oasis 2k3 is terribly out of shape and i try and point out out all the mistakes i can find... in a positive way... so that we donot become the butt of jokes... the schedule link still leads you to Oasis archives... and the ie bar still shows Oasis 2k3...

23rd night... Euphoria has to cancel its show on the 25th because Palash Sen lost his voice... everyone is in a state of shock and disbelief... no idea what to do and how to do... they try getting a new band in also...

24th morning we come to know from reliable sources that Euphoria thing is happening but on the 27th... more problems... scheduling... the mood in the Controlz booth was of frustration and they had almost given up hope... for the first time in my bitsian life i sympathised with them... i mean this was a bolt from the blue... it was a test and i believe they did well enough... though scheduling could have been better... but thats a different story...

25th morning... the d-day is here... for the first time in any BITSian inaug there is no huge mass of junta waiting at the gates trying to get in... everyone has been allowed inside and hats off to the audi force group for their absolutely amazing work... then comes another big surprise... Oasis inaug starts on time (i actually pinched myself to see if i was awake)... then the CCTV animated show begins with cool animation effects but a really poor dialogue writing and even more pathetic storyline... its time for introducing the stucca body and every fuckin outsti in the audi would have believed tat BITS was full of homosexuals... writeups 4 out of 7 stuccans on stage had gay references... they say time changes everything... earlier it used to be girls falling for the idiots in the writeups... now it is guys... then comes the time for the big let down... the prez speech.. he praises the "extra... extrava... extragav... extragavant" work the clubs and depts do during oasis... diro speech... man i missed Prof. Venkateswaran... and then time for the vote of thanx... and the gen sec describes Oasis as a cultural "exragavannza"... enough blushes... neways thankfully the shit gets over... then while Art 'n' Dee goes out for the inaug of the structure the we have the CCTV show... for clubs and depts... all i remember is that music club thing was hogged by jeete and that the audi force group did a better version of our very own fash p team... and then the most awaited part... the peformances by dance and mime clubs... mime started off in a dull fashion... but it was okay... the the dances... the most brilliant ones for the past quite some time... really well choreoed and well performed... chinnama chilkamma (meenakshi-tale of two cities)... kandisa (indian ocean)... fanaa (yuva) and finally main aisa kyon hoon (lakshya)... the mime meanwhile did brilliantly with amazing jokes and one real good Matrix sequence... thus ended the best inaug in a long time... then was the days other event for me... av quiz elims... i qualified due to my team (i always missed one)... neways till then we had brought to the notice of controlz the stupid mistake of scheduling two quiz events in a parallel fashion which they thankfully rectified... nd then Tarang and Fusion... Shrek rocked on the drums in Tarang... Jeete and Divs however stole the show in Fusion and after their solos there was not a soul in the audi who did not clap for them...

26th... second day... major events... choreo and prof shows... i cudn't attend choreo as i had to do the interview of Antaragini... a cool interview... and then spent the afternoon with aparajith i guess talking about stuff, something i did a lot this oasis... spending time with people talking about stuff... neways then came the evening and the the antaragini thing began at 10 or so i guess... started of slowly... me and bansal in the front row... but then the show gathered steam and i witnessed one of the most mesmerising shows ever... the lyrics made sense... hey bhagwan, i am in mumbai and lookin for a miracle... really good ones... the music mind blowing... i am sure gonna buy a tape whenever they release it... btw before the show me and bansal did the Mother Jane interview... it was gen thing i guess... then the screw of the fest... two hours gap... at 3 in the morning most of the audience was half asleep... but we still did manage to head bang at pull me under and also hallowed be thy name... great vocals... but too sleepy...

27th... did nothing all day log except put gen laccha and try for a euphoria interview... accha bhool gaya... also watchewd andholika... this girl from icfai tech... amazing voice... and music club performed fusion with prof sounds and sounded amazing... finally went to audi again at 7 to somehow get the interview done... most of the group except palash had come in to do a sound check... palash sen came in at 9 and till then we had witnessed a good testing with some cool music being played... palash comes in and agrees for the interview and goes for the sound check... he did look ill... neways he sung annes song (denver) and shine (collective soul... name inspired by one roark chappie btw).. sounded okay... then came the totally awesome interview... they were so cool... bansal and me doing the questioning and lightz, backstage, jai, rungta, jeete and akanksha being the sizeable audience (around 20 ppl i guess atleast)... at the end of which bansal and me requested for Ab Naa Jaa... and he asked who was doing the interview... we said ohp and oep... then the show begins at 12... on time... me and bansal and jeete and many others again in the front row... nice show... quite decent... most amazing part... he dedicated us the song... and i actually called up you guys for the song... just had to... it was brought back so many psenti memories of the last sem... a very lonmg show at 3 and a half hours... came back and enjoyed western jam till 7 in the morning...

28th... after that last day seemed like a dull one with me not watching anything except a bit of fash P in which i dunno how BITS won the first place... they were well choreographed though... and haan we also participated in the av quiz finals where finshed 4th after a late fight after being on 0 for long.... neways with that came the end of Oasis 2k4... after that was putting some psenti with jeete, bansal, dev and sanghi... we had all first become friends in Oasis 2k1... and after that some time at the club...

the most amazing Oasis ever... but that is what i say after every Oasis... i guess each one is special... just soak in all you can...

A well spent weekend....

Just wanted to write something after a long time...

A weekend that starts at 9 on Saturday night... Movie (a classic one at that)... Rain and rains all night and next morning one more movie... life definitely is good... what an amazing weekend... to top it off Schumi again is back in winning ways and polishes the Suzuka Grand Prix... fastest practice... fastest pre-qualifying... fastest qualifying and then winning without ever losing the top spot even in pits... sheer dominance... by the way did you know he had the fastest pre qualifying time in the Chinese GP before he spun, had a collision and a punctured tyre... and then what does the champion do to prove his greatness when everyone starts questioning his skills... he goes out in the last lap and sets the lap record for the race and the track... greatness... I haven't seen Senna but I am sure Schumi would easily measure up to him if not outshine him...

Neways coming back to the movies... First one... Rain Man... Dustin Hoffman and Tom Cruise... Dustin plays an autistic person who is the brother of Cruise, who plays a yuppie to perfection... Their dad dies leaving everything to Hoffman and rose bushes and an old car to Cruise, who is pissed off... and moreover he doesn't know he has an elder brother... then he takes Hoffman away from asylum to demand a part of the legacy but ends up "connecting" with his only family member during a week long trip... Dustin Hoffman is brilliant and though I haven’t seen many of his movies i do believe it is as good as All The Presidents Men... Tom Cruise plays the bad guy for once initially though... but looks good all through the movie... A must see..

Next one... American History X... A movie based on the Skinhead and Neo-Nazi culture that has plagued America after the KKK... Edward Norton (Italian job ka villain) plays a reformed skinhead amazingly and shows the transformation he undergoes during his incarceration... the transformation and his efforts to stop his younger brother from going down the same path as he did seem so realistic... the movie on the whole brings out the futility of the whole racial hatred thing... it can only further screw up things rather than solving them and can never let one be at peace... it proves that hate spawns further hate and only makes living tougher... the best dialogue... though the movie is filled with brilliant ones sample this...

Hate is baggage. Life's too short to be pissed off all the time.

If you haven't seen it, do it at the earliest possible....

TV and sound bytes

Ya, Goyal, it's a very valid point. I think there are quite a few reasons for it. First of all, it's the fact that we all like to have our time in the spotlight... and with half a dozen 24 hour news channels hiding mikes in every nook and corner for sound bytes, you only have to be remotely famous to get your share. And making absurd statements is the easiest way to get you there... Praveen Togadia is a fine example...

As far as this Dhananjay chap is concerned, it's a debate that shouldn't even have happened. I, personally, am not against death penalty... I agree, you can't go around killing everyone but I feel our legal system gives enough scope for appeals and reappeals... if in nothing else, here at least it's quite thorough in making sure that the case really is "rarest of the rare"... and if the high court, the supreme court and after that the president also decides that a person should be hanged, he must really deserve it. As definitely did Dhanajay...

You know what the basic problem is... I feel it's that people don't know what they're fighting for... they forget that if they're against death penalty, that doesn't mean they're for Dhananjay... coz how can they support a heinous killer. If they're against death penalty, they shouldn't be coming out on the streets a week before he is hanged and then forget all about it... the debate should be happening now... at this moment. I'll listen, give me a convincing argument and I'll listen. But don't you tell me Dhananjay deserves my pity... coz he doesn't... coz it's not a convincing argument... coz no one in his right mind would say that... coz if you're saying that, you're not against death penalty, you just wanna be on TV... you don't know what you're talking about...

Many years ago, I had read somewhere that after Nathuram Godse was hanged, they buried his body in some unmarked field and then planted grass all over so that the spot couldn't be recognized and idolized later... I often wondered why that was needed... there might come those who criticize Gandhi but would they really idolize Godse...

Hmm... maybe... I guess our forefathers knew us really well...

Of capital punishment...

Ah... lot of psenti stuff put up in a lasr few posts... Here is one of those not so psenti ones...

Last Monday there was this huge debate on NDTV about capital punishment being awarded for rapists... And I started thinking but this post is not about that issue... After a lot of thinking what I started to think was that we Indians have a habit of trying to make heroes out of villains...

I mean how else can one describe the huge number of so called "intellectual" people coming out and claiming that it was injustice to award Dhananjoy a death penalty... And that too for all pathetic reasons... They say his parents have no other support... Did anyone give Hetal's parents a thought... Again they say that he has been in imprisonment for too long and his mental state is not good... Ha... what a joke... was it ever ok??... and in any case the remedy for that is a quicker justice process and not letting him go free... But then the Bengali 'bhadralok' would be happy if he was set afree... but will they employ him as a gaurd in their own houses??

Boy I digress a lot... Neways getting back to the point now... Why do we have to make heroes out of such people?? Is it because or public figures have failed us too often... I could not think of anything better...

Anyone got other ideas???

Best days of my Life

This is my first entry in this blog.....after reading rahul's and goyal's entry, i m also in psenti mood....i just spoke to bansal and jeete convincing them to come to pune on sudeep's b'day...i know you guys are psenti semites and you have enough time but no money...don't worry i 'll sponsor your trip...just plan and come.....

seriously life is moving so fast.....i still remember rahul saying in railway station on our last meeting...dear bang is not that far from pune....we 'll meet on alternate weekends. but we are so busy that we are not even getting time to mail.

I am listening "with or without you" and "Ab na Jaa"....which is reminding me the old days...Nice days of psenti sem and those four years of BITSian life....

I am eagerly waiting for you people.......

Three years and so many more.....

Rahul wrote a blog sometime back about how quick time is and how we lose contact.... It brought back a lot of those old memories.... The movies, ANC trips, music nites and so much more.... Was it just three years??

I still remember that sleepy Sunday afternoon when I was introduced to four seniors.... Ankit, Thakur, Sudeep and Rahul.... and God knows that the three years was too less a time.... It almost seems like yesterday when we used to play NFS2 till late in the night.... just a few days back we had a movie marathon.... and that FRIENDS episode.... But if I look closely it was much more.... It wasn't just three years.... seemed like decades.... almost like I had known them for all my life....

Mails and sms are a farce and maybe that is why physical presence of a person is so necessary.... But then they provide a much needed contact.... just imagine where we would have been without all this.... aren't they a connecting lifeline.... 850 kms for just 24 hours doesn't seem at all foolish.... atleast not to me.... I remember travelling to Guwahati for a cousin's marriage.... more than 4500 kms just for 36 hours but then they were worth it....

Life will always move on keep moving and you know what we can get left behind.... but then thats what friends are for.... to always keep pulling you along.... and you will always be with us.... and you know why you cannot get left behind.... because then a part of us will be left behind....

And distances do not matter.... and thank you all for always being there....

I'll be there for you ... when the rain starts to fall.

I'll be there for you ... like I've been there before.

I'll be there for you ... cause you're there for me, too.

The road of life...

Ankit and I are heading for Pune in the first weekend of Oct for Sudeep's birthday... there still are hiccups that need to be overcome, but I'm sure I'm gonna make it there. When there's a will, there's a way... and this time round, there is more than will. It's gonna be a small meeting with Thax and Sudeep... about 24 hours in the train and almost the same time with them.

Ha ha, what has it come to... these were chaps who were always within shouting range... for 4 years... 4 long years that now freaking seem so short. The road of life has moved on and moved on real fast. An 850 kilometer trip for 24 hours, there was a time when I would have considered it stupid... a waste... I guess perception changes, for there's nothing in the near future that I'm looking forward to more.

I knew it would change, I thought I was ready for it... but it sure has ended up hitting me hard. I'm good at mailing, I'll keep in touch, it'll be the same... that's what I had thought... shit, I was so wrong... all the mailing, all the phone calls, all the sms in the world aren't even close to being an equivalent. Keeping in touch through mailing lists, scraps, nah, all crap... they're no substitutes. It's probably a bit psychological too... yes, there were those who I didn't meet for weeks on end... but at least I knew that if I wanted to, I could... maybe I really took them for granted.

Yes, there are those I've lost touch with... so soon... and they've just disappeared... All you guys... I hope you're happy... I hope you find what you're looking for... I hope we can meet again someday...

Goyal wrote in a mail and mentioned the Khetri trip... and memories just came tumbling forth... all those trips, all that fun... the first trip to Dhaba... there was that song we had sung all the way... "bas yaadein reh jaati hain"... life sure moved on quick... sometimes I feel I was left behind...

Love you all...

The intellectual kinds...

Don't be misled by the title... this is about BOSM and I guess the title will be clearer as I move along.

I wanted to hook on to the point Goyal mentioned regarding the fairness of BOSM scheduling. I'm assuming that Goyal actually meant the fairness of the draw. Putting the draw in such a way such that the BITS team always reaches the semis is quite unfair. I agree... In fact, I must say Dilee really tried to force his way through for impartial draws and did quite a good job of it last year, I'm not sure how things are turning out this time around.

This actually reminds me of something his person said to me a little before OASIS sometime... in my second or third year... (names are not important)... she said, "unless you are of the intellectual kind, I'm sure you'll agree that it is an unsaid rule for departments and clubs to help BITS teams." I had very politely told her then that I was definitely of the intellectual kind. If the BITS teams messed around with one of the rules, they'd obviously be disqualified.

Anyways, coming back to BOSM, it's the captain of the BITS team that makes the draw, he's the one who decides the seeds. And to tell you the truth, he's the only one who's qualified enough to do it. You really can't give it to a body like BOSM Controlz 'coz they'd have no experience... who's playing well, who is not, which looks like the better team, which team should be given a higher seed... how many matches would you able to fit, should you go for a pool or a knockout... all these decisions need to be taken and it is only the captain of the team that can. He is the one who has to be fair and the onus should fall on him.

To be unfair in such a situation is incredibly easy... I know team A and team B are better than the BITS team... I put them in the same half of the draw and put the BITS team in the other half... that simple...

To ensure that there is no scope for unfairness also is very simple... you just need the will to do it... you have a public drawing of the lots, you call a representative from each team and draw the lots in front of them. Yes, the BITS team might very easily get a shoddy deal... but then, that's part of the game...

I remember last time, after the ValD, this chap from COEP had come up to me, shook my hand and said, "Thanks man, for everything... last time we were a little annoyed with the way things were done but this time, it's been really fair... the best 4 teams reached the semis, the two best teams reached the finals, really good..."

I don't really know why he thought he needed to thank me for doing my job right (is that what it has come to these days?) but what I felt at that moment was easily worth all the BOSM medals... maybe some of the captains need to think about that...

My favourite BOSM memory is from a match that I lost... winning isn't everything, is it?

Four days at the Gym G.....

BOSM turned nineteen the day before yesterday amidst rains and a very dull inaug. It was all too boring or I guess I just miss the number of participants Bansal had been sucessful in getting in or maybe it is one of those psentisemite feeling that creeps in with the number of inaugs we have witnessed.They are so regular and strereotyped and its not just about BOSM. Whatever the Inaug turned out to be a damp affair both literally and figuratively.

The exhibition match was between BITS and COEP. Boy one of the things I miss in inaug since the first year is a good inaug match. Something like Loyola v/s. SBMJC. Neways the match seemed totally one sided and BITS won comfortably (that too with Shetty as the captain and Karthik,ex-captain, not playing.) The only match till now where BITS has looked like a good team was against SRCC where they actually ruled the first half. After that they soon ran out of steam and then SRCC took control. The reasons were many. Match was payed at 9:30 in the morning under scorching sun and the first change was that kid from Maharastra. I know if you have the skills and all physique does not matter but for gods sake the kid is about Bansal in height and cannot take a lap shot even. So poor was the BITSian bench strength that the five players couldn't take a much needed change. The worst was BITS v/s. Vaish Coll., Rohtak (funny story though, they believe that an OPEN meet is where anyone can come and participate and Debo wanted to know the Jats view on Australian Open.) You had to see BITS play to believe. They were pathetic and even though the opponents were mostly cricket players BITS struggled to make a good job of it. The couldn't catch the ball. They couldn't pass around. In short they sucked.

The match of the tournament so far was however SBMJC v/s. BRAC (defending champs.) I didn't see most of the match due to BOSM Quiz (man I missed Rahul in the elims... had you been there we could have qualified this time.... lots of tennis) Bansal did and guess what, the captain of BRAC did actually dunked in one match. When I last saw the scores it was 50-40 in favour of BRAC but SBMJC cracked the last quarter and won it. Man they sure do rock. Anyways we had better things to do then. Like going to the dhaba.

One of the questions that comes to my mind during BOSM is whether GSu's statement that BITS should compete against colleges other than the engineering ones. I mean BITS fares well against such colleges or atleast puts up a fight (like SRCC though its not an engg coll.) I mean they should compete against colleges where people have stuff to do other than just sports. Rst of the colleges send in pros. I know one cannot defend that statement but somehow I get that feeling and I don't know why. Also is it fair to have scheduling done in a way that BITS reaches atleast the semis of all events. I guess that the scheduling thing requires al lot of guts. Rahul would be able to answer that one.

BOSM quiz btw, I struck up a nice conversation with this guy from Thadomal, Mumbai and had a nice time in he quiz. He knew a lot and it was fun at the quiz with both of us answering a lot of questions and winning stuff. We actually answered the T-shirt question together but since he went up first he was given the prize :(. But then in the end it was nice fun and I guess thats what BOSM is all about.

About tennis. BITS getting into semis depends on two teams who are out of the tournament. Some tie break ka funda. Will keep you updated on that front. The best performance however comes from the football team who has won two matches 5-1 and 8-0 with our very own Sam scoring the goal of the tournament from somewhere near the half line. That's all for today. Chow!!

Reliving yesteryears...

BOSM starts today back in Pilani... and from what I hear, it's been raining. Maybe it's a tradition or something, but I remember there being rain before at least 3 of my 4 BOSM inaugs. There always is a struggle scheduling matches on the tennis courts, we wish the clouds would part for just a moment, that the heaven's won't open up till the last point is played. And everytime, the clouds listen to us... and the matches finish on time.

Four BOSMs and I must say it's been fun... and I'd probably give anything to be back there in Pilani right now... the excitement on inaug day... as you watch outstis practice... silently making mental notes of any flaws you might notice... "hmm... he struggles on a deep backhand... shit, forehand serve return is good... forward movement is slow... nice volley..."

There's a team spirit, a camaraderie, as you stand with fellow BITSians... knowing they feel exactly the way you do... that they're gonna get up at 6 the next morning with you... the day you've practised for before tests is finally here... standing there you realize that what you read somewhere was perhaps right... that it's about taking part and not winning... at that moment, winning is the last thing on your mind...

It's a momentary feeling... and it doesn't last long... the traditional baski match happens and while you're watching them play... you're actually somewhere else... you're on the tennis courts mentally wishing you didn't have to wait all night to play your first match... you see yourself hitting the winning shot a thousand times before you actually do...

The match is at 7 in the morning... and the only people on the court are the two teams... does it matter that there is no crowd... hardly... even if there were a thousand people, you won't notice them... all you see is the guy in front of you... this is the moment you've been waiting for... the moment you'll miss when you're sitting in Bangalore typing in a blog...

The match begins and you'd do anything to win... you'll play up on your opponents weaknesses, you'll even mentally psyche him out if you can... you find out he has a pulled muscle in his legs, you'll make him run around... you'll see him grimace, you'll feel victory is near... a sprained wrist and you'll get him to volley... because you want to win... because you know he'd do the same to you... because you know that he understands... because you know that when it ends and you shake hands, it will all be forgotten... there will be no grudges, you'll part friends...

Because you know that if someone asks you about the match 10 years later, the first words out of your mouth would be... "He had a sprained ankle and shit, he still fought so hard..."

To conclude...

I think it's been enough... we should conclude...

1> Hypocrisy in all forms is pathetic. One should have the courage to be true to himself and the world.

2> The decision what you wanna do with your life, how large a priority you want money to have, is a very important one. People should give it a lot of thought.

3> No one has any right to judge any such decision taken by someone. If a person decides to go after money, well, it's his decision. We wish him all the very best!

4> We are entitled to our point of views (extreme or moderate) and we'll keep blabbering!

50 overs ahead...

Yes Goyal, money can buy me a hockey stick but not make me enjoy playing with it. But then, why would I buy a hockey stick? I'll buy a pizza coz I know I'll enjoy eating it!

You said "money can buy you all things in life other than happiness"... such a cliched line.

Suppose there's someone who's real good at painting... but c'mon seriously, unless you make it really big, you're gonna be struggling all your life. He has graduated from an enginnering college, has a good degree. So, he had a decision to take... gus it all and start painting, try and make it big... or take up the software job.

Suppose he decides to paint, gus the job... maybe he makes it big... but maybe he doesn't... if he does, great, his belief paid off... if he doesn't... oops... he's a failed painter... he spends the rest of his life worrying about rents and bills, his child's education, the welfare of his family...

Suppose he decides that he's gonna plan out his life... he's got enough years ahead of him, he's gonna plan it... yes, he enjoys painting but money also matters... he decides he's gonna take up the job... work hard at it for the next 10-15 years of his life... he'll still paint in his free time coz he enjoys it... and if he enjoys it, he'll also find time for it too... inspite of his busy schedule... then, one day, when he has saved enough, when he thinks he has assured his own financial security... and that of his family... he'll say I've had enough... and start to paint... maybe he'll succeed, maybe he'll fail... in both cases, he'll still be ok...

There are 50 overs ahead of you... is it wrong to save your wickets (money in this case) so that you can slog in the end. Particularly, because in real life, there aren't just 2 fielders outside the circle in the first 15 overs. Afridi made the fastest century but he also failed many times. You have only one life... can you afford to fail?

Does nothing else matter??

I am against both Rahul but will come back to it after sometime. Sometime back Rahul wrote a intro for me and I guess I will do the same for him. Rahul is this person with moderate views and believes fiercely that a person has his/her own views and that they must be respected at all cost. Its thier own life after all. But then I guess I am an extremist and have very strong opinion on most subjects. But then I don't want to force them down anyones neck. I am just expressing my own views here. If anyone agrees its ok and if not it still is.

Now coming to the point. I am against both the points Rahul mentioned below, more against hypocrisy. But then I also don't feel that people leaving thier disciplines just for money are doing the correct thing. I don't say that money is not important. Without that I wouldn't be here typing in this post. But then the question remains, is it all that matters? Money can buy you all things in life other than happiness. It can get you the stuff to play hockey but it can't make you enjoy it. Do you not think that you would regret not having done what you wanted to once you think over stuff at some point in your life? Would you rather not follow your dreams?

If you are not enjoying it please don't do it. But do you think money should be the sole reason of not enjoying your job? I agree financial security is a major concern. And I am not judging anyone beacuse he or she made a choice. Who am I to judge? But I am just suggesting that they should also consider what they would be losing out on. I once had a lesson in Hindi which said something like "Its only the person that dives deep who comes up with a pearl. Someone who sits at the shore doesn't know that joy." But then I guess its not an ideal world. The priority given to money is not wrong. But don't you think the priority should be given a bit more thought. And I know it seems like I am saying all this because I want to appear cool. But please believe that this is not the case. This is something I believe in.

By the way tomorrow is engineers day. Here's saluting Sir Mokshagundam Visvesvarava and all other engineers who have helped India become self dependent in technological areas. Hats off to you all. Also guys this blog is getting like a dialogue between me and Rahul. I know people are busy but you all could atleast post comments.

Money matters

Just to avoid misinterpreting Goyal again, I'll put an if condition here...

I'm not sure what you're against, Goyal... is it leaving your education behind for monetary reasons... or is it leaving it behind for monetary reasons and not admitting what the reason is... if it's the second one, this post can be ignored... I agree hypocrisy in any form is pathetic. But if it's the first one, here goes...

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What's wrong in leaving your education behind for purely monetary reasons? I mean, money plays an important part in our lives, if some chap decides he wants to pursue a path that gives him faster and greater financial security, that's his decision... who are we to question it?

When I say you're not enjoying it, I also encapsulate the disenchantment coming in because you're not getting enough money... because you aren't saving enough for the future, or because you don't feel your education will lead you to a job that gives you enough money for the material comforts you want.

I know... it's really great to follow your dreams... but this is not an ideal world... not everyone is sure to be successful in what they do... so sometimes, you have to take the safer way out... it is a very personal decision. And neither you nor me has any right to say whether it was right or wrong...

I know it's really cool to say money doesn't matter... but the truth is, in this world, it does... and if someone decides to leave what he enjoys for money, it's sad, but it's his choice. It's not because he'll enjoy keeping the dosh stashed away... it's because he believes he'll enjoy the security money gives him more than the job he left. He prefers to do something that he doesn't enjoy now and make money out of it (so that he can grow old in comfort) than go and play hockey (to give an example) and face a potentially uncertain future.

Money matters, it's as simple as that... different people give it different priority... no one's right and no one's wrong....

Leaving your education behind...

This was actually gonna be a comment on Goyal's post... but then ended up becoming too long... so, I figured I'd rather post it...

I don't see what the fuss in not leaving your education behind is about... if, after 4 years of studying, a person realizes he's not gonna enjoy himself stuck in this field for the rest of his life, he has every right to leave. The choices most people make about their first degree in India are hardly based on what they're interested in... there's a bit of peer pressure to it, there's a little what everyone thinks would be good for him, there's a little monetary consideration, but mostly it's the fact that he isn't really sure what he's be good at, what he'd enjoy... career counselling is non-existent in this country, he doesn't know what the job will involve... he loves fiddling with wires so he decides to be an Electrical Engineer... but he doesn't make the cut off and ends up with Chemical... or if he does get into it, he finds out that it's not about wires anymore but some silicon chip... what's wrong with him decided to pursure other interests?

I mean, think about it, out of a 900 batch at BITS, how many got first choice? What is wrong with them saying, this sucks, it's not what I wanted, I've had enough... and even if they do get first choice, what wrong in them realizing they made a mistake and deciding to change streams? Personally, if I hadn't made a Comps dual, I'd have left Civil far behind anyways... that's a fact... and there's nothing wrong in that... I don't like designing structures why should I spend my life doing it? Just because I shouldn't leave my education behind? As far as I know, education is for my benefit, and not the other way around. In fact one of the reasons I joined BITS with a Civil degree was because everyone told me the environment there would help me in leaving my education behind, change streams if I wanted to...

The reason can be anything... it can be that I'd rather sit under an AC instead of surveying outside on site... or just the fact that I think there are greater opportunities here... or maybe that I enjoy coding... whatever it is, the point is, education is the means to an end... if it doesn't take me to the end I want, I have every right to pursue what I want, take a 180 degree turn if need be.

You're lucky Goyal, you've found your goal in life sciences... there are many who haven't... and they have every right to keep on searching... even if what they're looking for is a pot of gold... even if they plan on leaving the road they're on completely... even if it means "leaving [their] education behind"...

Comfortably Numb....???

There are a few images that always leave deep impact on your minds and will always flash in front of you throughout your life. There was a picture of a tiny hand tightly clutching a cross from amongst the many Belsan pictures Rahul had sent. For a moment I was speechless. I could think of nothing else and and was praying silently without realizing it. Maybe even searching for answers. Why?? Why kids?? Why innocent kids??

I couldn't help thinking about the countless families that were destroyed. The many inconsolabe parents who had lost a kid. The stunned kids inside who were clueless about whatever happened. The kids at home in an endless wait for their parent. The young minds which will always be imprinted with the image a terrorist killing thier friends. The explosion. The countless bodies. The blood. The screams. And then I was questioning God and in a way the terrorists. Why kids? What had they done to you? Why innocent people who do not know the difference between a "terrorist" and a "freedome fighter"?

How many more Hitlers? How many more Gujrat riots? How many more WTCs? How long will we stay Comfortably Numb?

We really do suck.......

Of Rediff, Indiatimes and BBC.....

Now that you know who Goyal is I accept the fact that many a times I digress but its what I feel very strongly about and somehow do not find words to express myself. About the last post I meant that i hate the hypocrisy which i thought was evident by the line "Cut the crap and have the guts to accept the fact that all you care about is the fuckin' money." I say fuckin' money because, is it all that we should care about. I know I need the money too but is it all I want?

What are my priorities? I want to do the thinking now and not when I am forty something and sulk about what probably I missed out in life. Don't get me wrong. I am not against earning big money. But you can earn a bit less say and do what you would like to I probably would take it up. I don't wanna later regret that the best years of my life were spent only earning money. All said and done I probably would agree with Rahul that it has to be done in moderation. But please do not leave your education behind. Or atleast try not to.

I still remember the night before the Infosys placement. I was trying hard to convince myself that I should make a job and guess what? I could not. Only after I had asked in the pre placement talk if the company had interest in life sciences could I get myself to go for the Apti. I wanted a job but I also did not want to do something completely unrelated to my education at BITS which is probably why I did not go for the CTS interview. They were paying about 30k more but had nothing to do in life sciences. I did not want to leave my field altogether.

Coming to a good news site. Rahul I have an advice. Try BBC and get a RSS feed read from the site in your Outlook mailbox. I did carry the Indonesia bomb attck story. As for Indiatimes.... forget it. Rediff though is better has still to go a long waybefore it gets to the level of BBC. Also one more thing we need to remember is that perhaps they are not purely news site unlike BBC.

But is that a good enough excuse? Maybe we have become insensitive to human pain. How many of us do really feel pained when people die in J&K? If we do why don't we question the government and it's working. How many of us remember Manipur and that perhaps it's still burning? It has been pushed to the middle pages for long now. All that matters to newspapers is the metros and states which are economically beneficial to them. I guess it all boils down to the same old question.

Is money everything?

I apologize Blogger!!

Hey, the previous post got published too... the damn dollar is up!

I apologize Blogger, out of all of us in this world... you're the only thing that doesn't suck!

Maybe you should start a news site too...

We suck!

I typed in a huge post a couple of days ago... only to get the stupid time out error the whole day. And this interface didn't even let me retrieve it... it was called "Of Goyal, rhymes and the damn dollar"... or something like that... it still exists on the dashboard, a broken link... Blogger sucks...

There was a terrorist attack in Indonesia yesterday... and there's no news on the Indiatimes "Top Headlines"... it seems "Asia's most expensive wedding ever" is more important. Indiatimes sucks...

Rediff talks of "A good workout, 20 minutes only" under their main six links... I searched more and under "News", the first link is "No sexy clothes for Chinese officials". There's no mention of the bombing... Rediff sucks...

Is this how it is? These sites are amongst the most visited in India... Indiatimes is hooked to Times ofIndia, a newspaper... is this all we're looking for... has our apathy really reached those limits... that we don't even care...

It's been a day, maybe it's old news... really? Something as horrifying doesn't occupy our interests for 24 hours? Why... because "only" 8 people died? Because it's thousands of kilometers to the east? Because it's not our problem?

Man, we suck...

Goyal... rhymes... and the damn dollar!

In case, someone who doesn't know us is reading this (although I really doubt it!!), I think you need a bit of intro... particularly after Goyal's last post. Goyal is this chap who always, always has the right ideas... but somehow in trying to convey them, he sometimes ends up saying something that is so wrong that he takes your mind off the basic idea he was trying to convey... by his own admission, "[he's] not good at expressing himself"... anyways, if something in that previous Goyal post pricked your eye, try looking deeper, don't go by the arguments too much... and he'll start to make sense because he means the right thing...

Also, a wakeup call... in AABA format...
"Ankit, this is YOUR blog
Don't let us hog
Stop being an IT engineer
Go kiss the frog!"

(In case, you didn't get the joke, you really need to hear the one about the IT engineer and the talking frog)

Anyways, let's get to the main point... money... and how important it is to us... well, this is the first time I'm out making some on my own... and when I want more, it's not about sending an e-mail to Dad... if there's a time in the future when I'd want more, I need to make sure I had saved earlier! And I'm still trying to get the hang of it!

In the end it's about enjoying yourself, isn't it? You wanna go club-hopping every weekend, you need the dollar... you wanna order a pizza every night, you need the dollar... buy an i-pod, get a laptop, you need money... it's a fact of life... as factual as a fact can get!

So, I guess at one point in life, around the same crossroad we're standing on now, you have to talk to yourself and decide... what is it you're gonna enjoy the most... what will satisfy you the most... it can be sitting at home with your family and friends watching a large screen TV with 3D surround sound... it can be the look of gratitude in the eyes of someone when you help build a waterline to his village... it can be trying to find a cure for AIDS and failing (at least I tried...)... it can be the pride you feel in wearing a soldier's uniform... or it can simply be writing a more user-friendly compiler (although that's hardly simple!!)... it can even be writing the minesweeper program, something on every computer...

(Ha ha, I can actually start quoting Maslow's Needs Heirarchy here!)

Reminds me of a Joey-Phoebe conversation... there are no unselfish deeds in this world... I don't think that's true... but if someone's going after money, should we really be criticizing it? Is that really so wrong? Isn't a person allowed to put his own personal self before everyone else? On the condition of course, that you don't screw over everyone else! We're talking ethics here!

The problem here probably is hypocrisy... that's the only thing I'm against... it's that student who refuses to admit that money plays an important part in his life, in his career choices... when it actually does...

I personally don't wanna be a slave to the dollar... but having said that, I realize that I still want to be able to wear a pair of jeans and Tshirt... save a bit for the people I love, for emergencies, I wanna be able to eat a pizza once in a while... go back home in a taxi instead of taking the bus... I don't wanna end up with a loved one in a hospital and no money for the bills... and therefore, am I not already a slave?

The way out I see is that I combine my work interests with money making interests, find a middle line and go at it crazy now... so that in the latter part of my life, I can sit back and do the things I would enjoy, help others if I can...

I haven't got it completely figured out yet... if you got any ideas let me know... I guess this is my quarter life crisis!

MBA and other fads...

A few days back there was this big discussion back at BITS on Is IT it?

And I thought , now that's an interesting thought. But today i read (read it here) this article on Rediff on how the IIM and other B-Schools showed an inclination for engineering students or atleast the admission patterns do. And this thing flashed in my mind? Has an MBA degree gained more importance all of a sudden and why? Should the question now not be Is MBA it?

I have seen in my batch a mob mentality among students to try out their hands at CAT even if they don't have a fuckin' idea about management. Ask anyone of them and they give that same old bull crap about how they always wanted to do something that has to do with management rather than writing a "stupid" code. I mean I am sick of the nonsense. Would anyone still take up management jobs if they paid some 4 lacs per annum or if "stupid" software jobs paid 12 lacs. I bet my ass they wouldn't. I mean give me a break guys. Will none of you ever do something original? I mean you say you got into the "stupid" engineering thing because of the parents. Now aren't you getting forced into doing an MBA degree just because you cannot resist that fat pay check. I have this EEE friend who was a very enthued EEEite till about a year back. He would not take up a EEE job because he is not interested in EEE now. He will not take up a stupid software job beacuse he doesn't wanna be one amongst the crowd. But he will ghot hi ass off for CAT doing those stupid numbers to get in there. He will go for a Schlumberger interview because he feels the job is challenging. Cut the crap and have the guts to accept the fact that all you care about is the fuckin' money. Will anyone ever do what he/she wants in this seemingly god forsaken country. We have the brightest minds in the country who have graduated from engineering college's throwing down 4 years of education to tarin for next two years as a manager and work for some foriegn company and make big buck's. Where will we get the R & D coming in from? Why fuckin' waste an oppurtunity? No one would want to be a teacher (though I guess it's challenging) coz its not their style (or for the truth, man they pay what?? chillars). I have renewed respect for Prof. Cherian and our very own VedP.

I mean people do things because its the hep thing to do or for money. I guess it does not require a rocket scientist to figure out why we have a measly number of Nobel Laureates and world class scientists. Or for that matter small number (an overstatement) of world beaters in all walks of life. There aren't many Tendulkars to give up education because he knew all he wanted to do was to play. There aren't many VedP's who would give up everything coz maybe he loved teaching.

Are there????

Of Olympics.....

I would like to agree and disagree....

Agree to the fact that Indians do care about anything just before it....long term planning is a joke to us.....and sport management a bigger one.....i believe that cricket is doing as well as it is because it is managed professionally and minimal political interference.....i read in the SandP 2004 that the best thing politicians did about Neuron was to stay away from it...btw if you haven't checked it out do it (here)......i mean those stupid idiots can give away money for idiots who went to iraq and got captured despite foreign ministry's warnings .....i mean that too after paying money to get them back as if they were heroes......and then we also do not denounce Islamic terrorism due to our secular government.....and they don't have money for our shooters to buy bullets and guns....they dont have money to hire a good, professional and young weightlifting coach.....i mean what loads of crap........

But then don't we think that there is some fault with the way the players approach the events.... i mean i agree that more than saying that anju didn't win a medal we should take a look at the fact that she bettered her personal best.....but then we also have people who have underperformed .... say for example our much hyped hockey team....i mean last two lympics....it was a heart break for me in sydney.....and also gave birth to a lot of anger....can't they do the basics well.....i mean look at the cricket team.....always trying harder and bouncing back just when we tend to give up hope......but i guess we have this is due to the fact that we are satisfied at being amongst the top and not the best.....i know there is a anju george and lee-hesh here and
there but do we really have committed people....

We need a complete overhaul.....both of the system and the indian psyche.....we need to have that itch to be the best....i know trying hard matters but so does winning....maybe have a killer instinct....as of the system....we can do better without....india is an example of how things where govt hasn't stepped in has done well..... cricket.... BPO.... software..... potential stuff which are still under government have wilted..... tourism..... sports.... industries..... labour reforms..... the list is endless......

But then how does it matter......next olympics is 4 years away.....till then anju's, malleswari's and the rathore's will be forgotten.......and also god knows how many stupid elections before it.......

Anyone listening?????

Our Olympians... and our OASIS

A preview on OASIS first... we've been having a huge discussion on OASIS in our mailing list... it's mostly been FashP but we seem to be moving on now... someone else can probably plug in the blog on it.

Anyways, I and Goyal had another discussion... mostly guided by a rediff article... (you can read that here)... and we both were of the opinion that the author's been a little too harsh. We don't have the world's best sportsman, that's a fact... so instead of blaming them, we perhaps need to delve into why the state is such. Personally, I think anyone who blames Anju Bobby George is out of his mind... as are all those people who called her this big Indian medal hope... realistically speaking, yes, she had a chance but everyone, from the officials to the media made it seem like she had a 99% chance or something... It's one thing to encourage our players, it's quite another to pressure them... which is what we do everytime. She went there and bettered her personal best, what more do we want from her? If her best wasn't good enough, it's not her fault, it's our fault.

If she has to come up with excuses, it's because we don't congratulate her on doing so well, we ask her why she didn't win... she hardly needs to be defensive of her performance... I for one, am proud of her... We really shouldn't be asking her why she didn't return with a medal when the figures show she actually did better than she has ever done.

And the best part is everything is now gonna be forgotten till Jan 2008... when everyone will wake up again... how many of us tracked our medal hopefuls during their progress in the past 4 years... how many of us had heard of Karnam Malleswari before she won a bronze in Sydney? I'm sure 80% of us didn't know Rathore some 15 days before Olympics started... why should we just blame the authorities saying they ignore our sportsmen... do we remember them?

The aim here is not to win an Olympic medal, it's to create world class athletes who will win everywhere. At other championships as well as the Olympics. And we have to start now... There will be some who like Lee-Hesh might not be able to make it but we already know they're right up there with the best in the world, they hardly need to prove it.

Of Audi ragging and bug fixes...

The same thing happens every year... First sem starts at BITS and the usual discussions start, how can OASIS be improved, how dumb the UC candidates are... Blab blah blah... And every year, it leads to no change... We're just a bunch of people who can sit and type... Or speak! (Goyal hopes to change that... Amen!)

Cynical, eh?? Well, it's the end of the day, the code I wrote has some runtime bug I can't trace, what do you expect??!

Typing in crap always cheers me up, which is why I'm here...

Mostly, till now, it's been confined to Goyal and me... We've been majorly blabbering about it on this mailing list we have and even had messenger sessions... Bansal, from the one mail he sent, seems hajaar pissed with the Audi ragging session... And particularly unimpressed by the way the EC panel went about it's job... (Ha ha, Goyal was on the panel... I sense a coldwar!!) Everyone else... We haven't had a comment in yet... Those Infy chaps seem busy with compres, majorly ghoting... Compres after college, sucks man! And Ankit as usual is dunno-where... A total repeat of BITS seems to be happening in Bang, and there is no Meghs around! Anyways, to be fair on him (he'll edit this post otherwise!), he's working pretty hard.

Hey, don't get me wrong, I'm working hard too... It's just that my code doesn't work!!

So, where were we... I think I digressed again... You'll have to get used to that... Whenever Ankit is kind enough to let me in, I'll make good use of mytime in the sun... Touch every topic I can... (Remind me to get to how the Karnataka govt has totally ruined our weekends!)

Anyways, to get back to the topic at hand... Good ol' BITSian electoral reforms! Audi ragging... EC Panel... Well, it seems to have provided a lot of entertainment this time too... Seriously man, an Audi ragging session beats quite a few of those RAF movies at entertainment value... It's a pity CCTV doesn't tape it, I'm sure the Union could make profit out of it. I'd buy it, it's so funny!! I heard this time around someone said the chief job of a campaign managerwas to change slides... I mean, isn't that funny??? After you're done being depressed of course!

Why do we have an audiragging session, Bansal raised that... I'd like to think it's for the first yearites... If you're not a fresher, you've already chosen who you're gonna vote for... Candidate-A or Candidate-B or None-of-these... Or you've decided it's not worth the trouble on a Sunday morning... You'd rather just sleep through the whole voting deal... There was a time when I, a fresher, sat in the Audi hanging on to every word (though the cheers and jeers sometimes made it impossible), trying to take my 'right-to-vote' seriously... I'd like to believe that most of the firstyearites are like I was, who haven't been swayed by the crap of politics yet, who have the minds to try and decide... I'd like to believe those are the people the Audiragging targets...

But then, does it??

Maybe we need to ask ourselves that... There is this whole talk about how inertia drags everything in BITS... It's done because it was done last year... Has the audiragging also become one of those institutions... Last year, it was a joke (seriously, CCTV should have taped it!) inspite of the best efforts of the panel... Seems to have been the same this time around too... Maybe we need to come up with something new... A better system... For the poor first yearites, if nothing else...

My advice to the freshers... Read the interviews that EPC does... They seem to give a better view of the candidates though I haven't got my hands on the latest issue yet... After all, its easier to judge how smart or dumb the replies are when you don't have people shouting from all sides... And if the Audiragging leaves you all frustrated, stop yourself before you go down the cynical road... Coz once you take your first step, there's no coming back...

I'll get back to my code now... (that was quite refreshing!!)

- Rahul

Search for the name

Rahul suggested that the first entry in the blog should be about how we went about searching for the name for my blog.
All credits to Rahul. He is the one who came up with the name.
Here is how it goes..... In the (sleepy) afternoon hours today, I came up with this (brilliant) idea to start my own blog. So I go to blogger.com (where else??) and create an account for myself. But the question was what shud the blog be called. I thought of "That's me in the corner" for name and "mycorner" for the url. Was not sure so decided to ping Rahul. When i told him that I was thinking of calling it "That's... corner", his first reponse was that the url shud be "mycorner". Alas, it was not what was meant to be coz the url was not available.
Next Rahul suggested "Swimming in a fish bowl" + "myfishbowl". However, It was rejeced without much thought because of certain reasons. After we had discussed a few more, both of us agreed on "Waiting for the winter sun" + "wintersun" but that too was not meant to be (God! Why me??).
Now we knew that the task we had taken up was not as easy as we had thought it was. After this, we tried "Till you came knocking at my door" + "mydoor" but yet again we were unsuccessful.
At this point of time, I was forced to change my line of thought as I had to leave for an important meeting. But Rahul, he didn't stop..... he kept on thinking and came up with some cool ideas... "just nod if you can hear me" & "justnod" and "smoke on the horizon" & "distantship".
Then,.... it was then that the masterpiece came - "On the road again" & "eastofomaha"..... Seeing this I knew that the success was near. All that was required of me was execution.
And thus, this blog was created.

---This is just the Beginning---

Here I go....

Just thought of creating a blogspot.....
No strings attached, its a nice way to put down your thoughts.
Hope I continue and its not a one time thing